Killer Whale

"poetry was the only thing that kept me clinging to the threads of what i was told was a perfect existence . "

author's note: this fanfic is set in 5,003 AS (in the wof world), and is told from the point of view of princess orca. constructive criticism is welcome, and i may well be adding extra poems to it later on. i have very detailed designs for all my characters, so if you want to see those feel free to ask- ty for reading, and enjoy! ~riley

killer whale a killer is deadly dangerous dauntless the glint of a knife in the dark a cold breath of your neck a sense of unease a feeling that you’re not alone

a whale is controlling commanding colossal the flip of a tail an eruption of water as it breaks to the surface the queen of the sea

a killer whale is harmless black and white and beautiful but powerless

a killer whale is an orca i am a killer whale

rebel in all my life i have had three friends my first friendship was short-lived his name was puffin he was kind he was thoughtful he was clever he was a low-born servant he was an unacceptable companion for a princess he was banished to the outskirts of the bay of a thousand scales when mother found out he was talking to me i never saw him again

the next day was the talons of power ceremony i found out i was an animus a long time ago when i enchanted a piece of kelp to keep mother from forcing me into more aquatic lessons with whirlpool i’d kept my power hidden afraid she’d find out what i’d done with that power she seems to have of knowing everything i’ve done without being told by anyone but i had grand plans for the ceremony when i would reveal my magic to the nation and everyone would finally respect me and maybe maybe mother would finally be pleased with me it was going to be perfect

"i just have a feeling that orca will be an animus" mother said as she smiled down at me and for what was maybe first and last time it was a real smile everything was perfect and yet all i could think about was puffin and all i wanted to do was wipe the smile off her face

i hid my power the coconut i was supposed to levitate never left my talons i was two years old

and already a rebel

i never knew my second friend does that sound insane? but they called themselves a friend i believed them since i don't exactly have a choice i laugh when dragons talk about choosing their friends but it is a bitter laugh

i used to write poetry in the back of my history scroll risky since whirlpool could have taken it in at any point but blank scrolls were not something i had access to

i wrote a hate poem to whirlpool once in return for all the love poems he "dropped" in front of me subtly hinting to our future engagement

i almost hoped he would find it and see what i really thought of him away from all the stiff formalities of the seawing council i hoped it would burn him deep inside and inflict even a fraction of the pain i felt every day but somehow at the same time i was so so so scared of him finding them but i kept writing anyway because poetry was the only thing that kept me clinging to the threads of what i was told was a perfect existence.

and then one day i found a scroll on my desk and at the very top in beautiful swirling handwritten letters it said "for your poetry from a friend"

"from a friend" i filled up that scroll years ago but unlike my other poetry which i tear up and cast out into the ocean in the fear of mother finding it i have kept it buried deep under my jewellery a flame that mother can never extinguish a reminder that things will get better a promise of a happier future a whisper of hope a friend

mother mother and i have what would in polite society would be called a very strained relationship and what in impolite society would be called mutual hatred though of course she pretends to dote on me in public telling everyone how proud she is of me and how talented i am (though i'm not at all) her voice dripping with sarcasm and beautiful venom

i am late back to the palace that afternoon this is intentional i am to attend a council meeting whirlpool tells me this with a leer his sly smugness circling my senses and all i want to do is lash out and snatch the smile from his face but instead i smile like a model princess dawdle on the swim back to the council chamber and begin to compose a poem inside my head

whirlpool see the sly slimy seagull sitting smugly on the sand and spy the sneaky slick assassin sailing swiftly to the land spot the glint of her knife as it flies through the air suddenly there’s no seagull there

on reflection my poem felt good to write but looking back at it i’m far from happy i see all my mistakes and i feel the need to cover them up i’m raw exposed

mother has taught me well

council i sit in the council chamber i pick at my food it’s cold the council meetings are almost the only time i get to see gill my father i suppose i should feel happy about that but i search myself for the love and warmth I know I should be feeling and all i feel is emptiness

i watch a beetle crawl across the table it scuttles across the table it’s very shiny i can vaguely hear moray saying something about "cutting the cost of the eel-eating masses" but she seems a long way off compared to the beetle maybe i should name it but i don’t know what i should call it i watch it crawl across the main courses and over to the side and then it stumbles into whirlpool’s talons he toys with it for a while dropping it from one talon to the other in a graceful arc and it makes me want to scream three heartbeats later and it is dead

"NO!" i half scream this launch myself across the table it’s as if i’m possessed

all it takes is the harsh, disapproving stares of the council pricking the back of my neck to bring me back to my senses "believe me, orca, we will be talking about this very thoroughly when we get back to our chambers" mother says, smiling that fake smile that drives me crazy

i smile back at her innocently and make a mental note not to return to our chambers while she’s in the deep palace.

she flashes her scales at me how could you embarrass me like this? i turn away and pretend not to notice the shame burns through me and i blink back tears

looking back, i think i know the perfect name for the beetle orca

hello orca mother comes up to me after the meeting "hello orca" she says i can feel her cold displeasure radiating through the room and suppress a shiver "mother . " i dip my head slightly i refuse to bow down to her i refuse to let her win

she sighs "you musn’t behave like this" "like what?" i blink up at her innocently she doesn’t meet my eyes there’s a pause she breaks the silence first it shatters on the floor with a sudden smash "we have a meeting with the mudwing messenger this afternoon be there . "

she walks away.

tension is a taught arrow stretching through all of my conversations hanging in the air between us the string quivers pulled back as far as it will go we attempt to pull it further and delay the moment of impact but we both know that eventually one of us is going to

snap

mudwing messenger she’s young just turned seven maybe my age she should be out playing in the sun happy free not here, far away from her home and her family surrounded by the suffocating stuffiness of the seawing council

she’s pretty beautiful even her scales catch the sun and glint in beautiful shades of amber her eyes are green startlingly green but it’s her smile that makes me warm inside

"i’m amber" she says and her voice sounds like music

"we don’t care about your name, mudwing" evidently it doesn’t to my mother.

the mudwing amber suppresses a giggle this is funny to her? she sees me watching catches my eye and grins i look away.

"alright" she shrugs "i’m here to bring you this . "

i hadn’t noticed she was carrying a scroll she flings it casually it lands at mother’s talons

i watch mother’s face as she reads it scornful then frightened then pale she runs out of the room leaving me alone with amber

amber in the three weeks that she stays with us i get to know her i spend almost every waking hour with her i think i’m a little in love with her maybe more than a little i don’t write much poetry i don’t need to i have amber

intertwined tails tangled eyes locked hearts beating to a beautiful rhythm a song a symphony

you make me whole you fill my doubts my fears my emptiness with love and joy and hope

our fates our lives our worlds are intertwined we are intertwined

council ii mother finally shows us amber’s scroll it’s a peace treaty from queen moorhen a desperate attempt to stop the war before it really starts the war has never been a big thing for me but amber’s sibs died in battle so of course i argue for the acception of the treaty

mother’s ice cold gaze rakes along the back of my neck she laughs at me the whole council laughs at me and that is the end of that

we send a reply to moorhen just one word

no

gone amber is gone she’s gone back to her kingdom she’s gone she’s gone she’s gone she’s gone

i am broken

sister my mother takes me to the hatchery shows me an egg my sister this is her way of apologizing for the way she has treated me i do not accept

my sister’s egg is very pretty it’s a pure shade of blue they’re going to call her angelfish the perfect name for the perfect sister

three more weeks pass at the pace of a sea-snail before amber comes back with queen moorhen’s response her face lights up when she sees me i blink back tears for what feels like the millionth time that week but they are happy tears

eyes in the dark amber and i are officially a thing now she asked first i would never have the courage to do it i am currently excused from council meetings due to a "stomach ache" but rather than stay in my chambers like i have been instructed i tour the bay with amber it’s warm and the sun spreads over my wings

i get back to my chambers late and something feels out of place i grab my spear and clench my hands into fists i walk forwards slowly i see eyes in the dark

"who are you?" i shout pulling up the vines covering my window light streams into the room and i catch a glimpse of dark green scales not unlike my own "i . . . i’m plankton" they say "do you remember me?" i don’t. " . . . of course i do!" i say a feeble attempt at lying

they’re probably a councillor i glance at them again a little young for a councillor about my age plankton smiles. "i hoped you would . though i’m a little bit different to how you remember me i . . . i figured out that i’m not your brother" plankton was my brother? oh. that plankton.

"i figured out i’m non-binary . don’t tell mom . " "why not?" the words come out of my mouth right as the answer slapped me in my face mother is not kind to differences "i mean… of course not . what are your preferred pronouns?" plankton breathes a sigh of relief. "they/them . " we smile at each other for a moment there is a silence but unlike in the council it’s a comfortable silence. plankton is the first to speak. "do you still write poetry?" "how do you know i write poetry?" i snarl. the expression on their face shakes me to the core. they look how i feel whenever i’m in a room with mother sad confused angry frightened small. am i really like my mother? i take a deep breath. "that was aggressive . i’m sorry . " plankton closes their eyes. "i found your poetry when you lent me your history scroll i had to borrow it to copy down the facts for our history essay do you remember? i didn’t mean to look i just saw them i left you a scroll i thought you knew . "

oh.

plankton becomes the third dragon to know about amber turns out they already knew and the reason they were in my chambers was to throw off whirlpool’s suspicion

the three of us are very close when amber leaves plankton smuggles our letters in and out of the palace and i keep writing and waiting and hoping that she’ll come back

angelfish i stare at angel’s egg it’s going to hatch soon, mother says she’s going to hatch soon my sister

i’m not sure how i feel about that sad betrayed lonely replaced and yet somehow protective i make a silent promise to give her the best life she can possibly have

two days later i enchant a piece of stone to become a statue of myself so she grows up knowing she has a sister who loves her

i don’t tell amber there are some things amber doesn’t need to know

secrets there are only two secrets i keep from amber the first is my magic she would want me to tell mother and wouldn’t understand why i can’t. the second is whirlpool.

king and queen whirlpool wants to be king mother wants him to be king father wants him to be king the council wants him to be king and i, coral’s eldest daughter and first in line for the throne want amber to be queen

i have been told many times that life is like a game of chess

and with two queens on my side i am bound to win.

queen orca i have a dream that night a future where i am queen mother and father are long dead the war is over the tribes live in harmony and amber is my queen

it is a beautiful vision but what frightens me is that the most beautiful thing about it is not peace or harmony or even amber

it is me queen orca

amber has come back to the palace she brings another note from queen moorhen i would have thought the mudwings would have given up by now but apparently they are very persistent sometimes i wish i was a mudwing.

amber and i spend the whole day together we get back late as usual she walks with me to my chamber throwing caution to the wind we're laughing and suddenly she goes quiet

two seawings are standing outside my door

my mother and

whirlpool

remember this moment whirlpool smirks at me the rings on his fingers glinting catching the sunlight in a picture of wealth and prosperity. i stand in front of amber protecting her from his gaze. "i didn't want to believe it," mother says. "whirlpool told me but i didn't want to believe it . " "believe what?" i ask i refuse to give in to her "that you… and this mudwing…" she looks at amber like some sort of sea slug making me boil inside "have you ever considered the possibility that i don’t want to marry whirlpool? that i want to be my own self? that i want amber to be my wife?"

there is a pause and i know i have made a mistake mother grabs me by the arm her talons scraping my scales she drags me all the way to the hatchery

"you don’t want to be queen? fine but remember this remember you are replaceable and if you ever ever talk to that mudwing again i will hunt her down and kill her i don’t care what you think of whirlpool he is the council’s chosen king you have no right to deny him and if you do one dead heir is not going to stop his ascension to the throne"

she steps closer in this light, her eyes seem to glow red

"remember this moment remember this moment whenever you think you can be anything more than whirlpool’s queen"

the hatchery door slams shut behind her leaving me alone under my statue

hot, angry tears fill my eyes i stare at my unborn sister innocent and pure i swear to my sister and to all my sisters along the line that as long as it is in my power to stop it she will never have to live like me i cannot find it in me to smash her egg and i couldn’t do it now anyway not without mother finding me out

but i don’t have to my statue can

letters of course, amber doesn’t give me up that easily and nor do i we write letters daily i tell her all the things i never told her before (well, almost . how could i tell her that i had killed my sister?) i tell her about whirlpool i tell her what my future is supposed to look like i share my poetry i tell her that if my mother ever finds our letters she is as good as dead she does not care nor do i, really we are both dizzy, blinded by love and stupidity though maybe those are the same thing

it is a beautiful day the sun is shining it’s golden haze spreads across the land i feel content i should have known better

i’m reading a romance scroll and wondering when amber’s next letter will come through it’s been a while since i’ve heard from her when plankton bursts in they’re panting out of breath "orca, you have to get out of here" they say. "what’s going on?" i ask plankton is silent unease creeps up my spine. "it’s . . . amber . " "what about amber? plankton! tell me the truth!"

there is a pause. "she’s dead, orca . "

amber amber? amber? amber? amber? amber? amber? amber? amber? amber? amber? amber? amber?

tell me beautiful lies i would rather never know the ugly truth this is where it crumbles we came for honesty but we did not like what we saw

i am beyond pain beyond anger beyond hurting beyond broken "orca…" plankton says, their talon outstretched i push them away. "i will kill her . " i growl my voice sounds unlike my own. darker. more powerful. "she is not fit to rule any more i will kill her . " there is yet another pause. pauses seem to be a thing nowadays. i’m sick of silence. "I WILL KILL HER!" i howl to the sky.

what they say "i know you’re scared and alone and hurting but things will get better i swear things will get better nothing is unfixable you can’t bring dragons back from the dead but you can move forward from their deaths this doesn’t have to be the end and i know you think you can win against her but orca you’re only seven and mother is so much stronger you have to see this is a suicide mission"

what i say "my mother is weak she is used to sitting around and having everyone bring her everything she wants she is not used to fighting for it i know that i can win but if i don’t and if you’re right and if this is a suicide mission i do not care because i have nothing left to lose i have already lost everything"

killer whale ii a killer is deadly dangerous dauntless the glint of a knife in the dark a cold breath of your neck a sense of unease a feeling that you’re not alone

a whale is controlling commanding colossal the flip of a tail an eruption of water as it breaks to the surface the queen of the sea

a killer whale is black and white and beautiful

i am a killer whale i am beautiful i am powerful i am deadly

i guess it’s time i finally started living up to my name